Carmex on a plane!

Anybody who knows me very well will testify that I don’t play well with rules. I mean, I know we need them and all, but there’s SUCH humor behind them sometimes.

I was detained at the security checkpoint at DFW airport today to have my carry-on bag searched. The culprit? A 1/4 ounce jar of Carmex. Yup. “It might be C‑4,” the guard told me after weaving his gloved hands through my stuff to snare the evil lip balm. I invited the chap to have a little dab, but he said, “Well, that’s not the point, is it?” Indeed.

Beyond the checkpoint was a gift shop, where I was able to obtain another 1/4 ounce jar of Carmex.

Onboard the plane came the recorded announcement: “This MD-80 aircraft has been outfitted with new, expanded overhead storage bins, so that you can more easily store your carry-on items.” I snickered, because what’s happened since the London business and these new rules is that fewer people are using carry-on luggage.

Once in Nashville, I drove to K‑Mart to purchase four dollars worth of toiletries that I won’t be able to take back with me. Terry, Terry! Why not just check your luggage? Because my time’s worth more than $4 for 30 minutes.

I kept waiting for Samuel L. to show up and deliver the punch line. “We’ve got to get this muther–cking Carmex off this muther–cking plane!”

Life has its humorous moments.

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